Sunday, January 13

“I am unworthy”

Scripture: Genesis 31-33, Luke 13

Genesis 32:10 I am unworthy of all the lovingkindness and of all the faithfulness which You have shown to Your servant; for with my staff only I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two companies.


This verse jumped out at me.  Jacob is praying in desperation for protection from his brother Esau.  He reminds God of two things.  First, he is returning to Canaan because the Lord said—he is doing this in obedience.  “Lord, I’m in this fix because I’m obeying You!”  Second, God has promised to prosper him and multiply his descendants.  “Don’t forget Your promises to me!”  Those promises seemed in serious jeopardy when he heard that Esau was coming to meet him with 400 men—an army!  Why do you ride with an army?  To attack!  So Jacob prays earnestly.  “Deliver me from the hand of my brother!  I fear him!”  

Verse 10 is in the midst of the prayer for deliverance.  It is an acknowledgment that Jacob is not worthy of God’s favor.  That favor is seen in the fact that 20 years earlier, Jacob had arrived on Laban’s doorstep with nothing but his staff, and now he’s returning home as “two companies”— with four wives, 11 sons and a daughter (maybe more), and vast wealth in flocks and herds.  


Why did this jump out at me?  Because I feel exactly the same way!  I could pray, “Lord, I am unworthy of all your lovingkindness and faithfulness which you have shown me!  I came here 40 years ago with only my wife (and my dog), and now I have become many companies!”  This is true not only in my family (5 kids and 9 grandkids), but in our ministry too (from the two of us, to multiple churches and thousands of people).  

I feel overwhelmed and humbled by God’s grace to me—something I know I don’t deserve.  “I am unworthy.”  God is good!

Prayer: Lord, words can not begin to express how grateful I am to You.  You have been far better to me than I deserve!  I owe You everything!